0 to 100

Then:

Eight months ago I walked away from a peachy, picture-perfect relationship in order to “find myself.” My ex and I had been together for seven years and were on the verge of engagement. We lived together. We had a dog. We even started saving baby clothes. Everything seemed planned out with precision until, one day – I got an unexpected phone call. A recruiter in Silicon Valley was seeking me out for a prestigious position at a top tech company.  This opportunity was exactly what I had been dreaming of. Despite living 100+ miles away, I accepted the offer.

When I began my new job, I was suddenly surrounded by the elite working class. Every corner of campus was occupied by a new accent. I had never been exposed to so many brilliant, globally-diverse minds. My office floor alone was home to four startups acquired from countries across Europe and Asia.

Being in the Silicon Valley had a powerful impact on me. Maybe it was the surplus of tall, foreign men in leather boots or perhaps (more likely) it was the re-awakening of my inner career woman. Either way, each day I went off on my commute, I grew frantic with inner turmoil contemplating the pros and cons of staying with my ex. Was this it? Was I doomed to a lifelong dependence on Netflix and chill? Would I be having babies? Would I be arguing with his mother over what food to feed the kids?

Although every ounce of my rational mind told me to stay and take the safe route, the temptation of a new life was overwhelming and  ever increasing in power. Most of my friends thought I was “just going through a phase,” and suggested I “wait it out.” They were wrong.

Within half a year, my darling relationship had completely crumbled.  I couldn’t quell the curiosity of what things were like on the other side. I wanted material gain; I wanted sexual escapades, but most importantly: I wanted self-discovery.

After much deliberation, introspection, and self-doubt, I chose the unknown. Leaving a serious relationship for a legitimate “It’s not you. It’s me,” is wholly confusing – especially in your late twenties. You question everything about yourself. You wonder if you have an underlying personality disorder or a crippling case of commitment issues. You wonder if you’re a self-saboteur, destined to be forever alone. You ask, “What happens when I’m old?” Giving up my prospects for the future family that more than a few friends had been jealous of, gave me immense guilt. But I gave it up anyway – I gave it up on the haunting hunch that there was more for me out there. So what if I were a heartless person willing to abandon seven years of loyalty and security for selfish hypotheticals? Who cared if I no longer understood myself or my emotions? I took the plunge.

 

Now:

In the short time I’ve been single in the Silicon Valley, life has been saucy. I’ve started, ended, and re-started a myriad of trysts and imbroglios. I’ve encountered the polyamorous, the commitmentphobes, the family-freaks, the rich sociopaths, the socially awkward, the narcissists, the ghosters, the founder fuckboys, the Tinder terrorists, and the scandalous: coworker conundrums. I’ve seen a lot. I’ve been through a lot. And now it’s time to talk about it. After all of my dalliances, there is no way I could write about my affairs without:

A. Getting fired,
B. Isolating myself from friends and acquaintances,
or
C. Pissing off everyone I’ve ever dated or am currently seeing.

So, here I am, here to give you the anonymous insider scoop from a personal, unfiltered perspective.

 

Welcome to my life – a mix of Sex and the CitySilicon Valley, Gossip Girl, New Girl, and whatever happens to be playing on Lifetime.

6 thoughts on “0 to 100”

    1. Thank you so much! That means a lot. I’m just starting to get into WordPress. It’s intimidating!

      But really – I’m really excited to have found your blog. Newly single, hot mom – fantastic! I’m browsing through your stories, and I think we’re going to have a lot in common.
      Isn’t the SF dating scene crazy?

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Yes, it is… but you’re already ahead of the game by already having a hosted domain name. I haven’t even gotten that far!

        I love your writing style. Reading your entries reminds me of watching one of my favorite shows, Silicon Valley. LOL!

        Yes, the SF dating scene is crazy! It’s the main reason I started a blog! 😉

        Liked by 1 person

      2. Oh wow! That’s one of my favorite shows too! And yes, I will be writing many more Silicon Valley-esque stories 🙂

        I’ve been meaning to start this blog for months now. I had the name in mind for a while, and I finally bought the domain because I wanted to go all out/get motivated to actually do it.

        I’m so amused by the endless stories out there. There is much to write about.

        Liked by 1 person

      3. There is! It can get overwhelming sometimes. I, for example, have a backlog of material I just haven’t had the time to actually write about. There’s new material on an almost daily basis.

        Liked by 1 person

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